number four.

Well it's Friday night and I'm sitting at home watching tv and procrastinating from doing an assignment for directing, this will further my procrastination as well as making me feel like I've done something. Overall, a good move.

What have I been watching?

Blood wedding put on at Monash Uni student theatre, it was pretty super with the most amazing set. the concept worked so beautifully and visually and aurally it was fantastic. I do reccomend if you're in the wedding

australia's next top model, this is the worst show ever made yet I am strangely addicted to it, i watch it and think "you idiots, why are you doing that? why are you talking? and yet I am watching it week after week. hmmmm, I dont recommend this show.

what have I been reading?

a million little pieces by james frey,I finished this the other day and overall I quite enjoyed it, however there's all this controversy that most of it is fake, this is interesting coz as you read it you wonder how he got around talking about the other people in the book, and if he had to ask them etc. I'm pretty sure most people wouldn't want to be written about while in rehab, especially some of the characters who're shown in a not so nice light. But it was still interesting, still worth a read.

on the road by jack kerouac, I've just started this, its good so far, I like the way its written, he has a nice language. more updates when I'm further in. It is a classic so definitely worth it.

what have I been listening to?

Patrick wolf, el perro del mar, cocorosie, and adele, all thanks to last.fm which you enter your own music library in to and it tells you what music you'll probably enjoy, a friend told me about it and since then I've got my hands on said music and had a great time. Listening to new music is good, I hadn't gotten any new stuff for ages.

what have I been doing?

Most of this week has been doing my assignment for PER which is on anxiety in our society, its around 3200 words and I really enjoyed writing it, which is abnormal, hopefully I'll get a good mark and it will be recieved well. I've also been helping Blood Wedding to get on their feet with random set stuff and costume detailing, it was nice spending time with the cast and helping them out, and it also provided adequate distraction from other homework.

Today I had outpatient therapy which was alright, talking about anxiety made me anxious, but since it's a new group we're mostly starting at the same level and that was comforting. I fell asleep in meditation/relaxation which you arent supposed to do but everyone did, it's just so calming...I then proceeded to go home and go back to sleep, til 5.30pm, I'm tired all the time which is really frustrating and disrupting, I dont know if it's medication or depression but I'm sick of it none the less. That and weight gain have been big issues for me recently and I'm just taking it day by day and trying not to think about much else!

Coming up this week is a friends 24th birthday party which should be fun, it'll be good to see friends. I have a presentation to do on Monday which should be good and also my directing essay which I keep putting off and I really need to start, if anyone wants to write me an essay on Grotowski and Brook just let me know. Other than that we have directing showings and I'm also going to be rehearsing a play over the holidays with the Honours program, this means that I'll have finished a subject in week 4 of semester. Which is Awesome.

I think thats all for the moment.

Peace out.

L.

number three.

I've been back at uni for just over a week now and so far it's going well, some frustrating conversations, and awkward moments but other than that I guess it's back to normal. I'm just frantically trying to catch up with assignments and everything considering we only have three weeks left of term.

In order to do this I've been reading up on various philosophical ideas and whatever they're called, and I'm enjoying Alain De Botton's 'Status Anxiety', which looks at how we handle anxiety about status and how it came about and how it affects various facets of our lives, it's an awesome book.

I also bought A Million Little Pieces by James Frey which is an autobiography of his life as an addict and how he gets better, so far it's pretty good, I guess he's just putting it out there that there are other ways to get better besides the twelve step program, it's much more bleak and down to earth which I like.

Alongside this I bought Jack Kerouac's 'On the Road' and 'The Social Contract' by Jean-Jacques Rousseau. My sister bought two books which I plan to read and they are 'One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest' by Ken Kesey and 'The Consolations of Philosophy' by Alain De Botton. These were all bought over the weekend as I avoid my need to buy new clothes as not many of them fit any more and I opt for the less confronting purchase that is books. Weight gain is frustrating and I dont want to waste my money on stupid clothes for my fatso body.

Anyway, I have also been listening to Ratatat a bit, they're nice and instrumental so no words to get mixed up in but after a while their stuff's a bit repetitive. Antony and the Johnsons' 'I am a Bird Now' is an AWESOME album, I've been listening to it over and over again and his voice is so interesting and the way he sings the melody of his songs is beautiful, and the arrangements are beautiful! I just love it.

Um, what else have I been doing? Not much, I'm going to group therapy twice a week, it's good because I get to be around people who understand what I'm talking about and we learn as a group how to overcome various problems, it's also nice to be able to give other people feedback, and to be reminded that heaps of people have these problems, not just you.

Thats all for now unless I think of something else I should add (which obviously I'll do later if I think of anything.)


L.

number two.

Happy Mothers Day is where we shall begin, I hope everyone is doing something nice for them, I made my mum two prints for the laundry (she wanted some art to put on the walls) and a card and my sister and I bought her an ipod shuffle. I made her breakfast in bed, on a whole a successful Mothers day.

A close friend of mine gave me a packet of incents that she burns in her room, I burn them in my room now and it's amazing how a smell can change the mood of a space, just thought you should know.


Films:

Pan's Labrinth: I watched it last night and it is an amazing film however it put me in a somewhat melancholy mood which wasn't helped by the fact that I'd had a three hour nap and couldn't get to sleep for a while. But anyway, it's an awesome film, watch it, if you've seen it then watch it again, such a beautiful story and the cinematography is fantastic.

Music:

Jenny Wilson: She is awesome and amazing, I can listen to her music all day.

Air (Virgin Suicides soundtrack): Great soundtrack for a great film, it's really good background music as well as being interesting enough to listen to in the first place.



I have no plans for today, it feels good to have no plans, I like this feeling, I want to keep this feeling for those days when you have too much to do and not enough time.

L.

number one.

Well this is the beginning of possibly a short lived blog depending on my mood.
This shall be a place to share to no one my love of various crafty fun websites and other cool people/things that I find on the internet as well as a mostly anonymous account where I can vomit out my frustrations and annoyances that occur in my personal life since I'm not a big sharer but I do like venting somewhere, so here is the place it shall be.

We shall begin,

cool things to look at:

www.kerismith.com
she's amazingly awesome, buy her books, read her blogs, look at her rad illustrations.

www.veganandvintage.blogspot.com
rad melbournite with awesome fashion and knitting skills.

www.hel-looks.com
for fashion inspiration and general awesomeness check out the faashion of helsinki's finest.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/sarahwalker/
Skwalks' flickr account, check out her 366 faces of ego project, it will blow your socks off.

Reading:
Okay so go out and buy J.M Coetzee's 'Diary of a Bad Year', it's rad with amazing mini essays written in a fabulously intellectual tone and awesome opinions. He calls himself a quietist-pessemistic anarchist, and the explanation of this is rockin and fits me and a lot of my friends to a tee, so check him out. I'm reading a novel by him at the moment called 'Elizabeth Costello' and it is also rad.

Also read Gabriel Garcia Marquez' 100 years of solitude, it's beautiful.

Listening:

Lykke Li, Sia's not so new album, Grizzly bear (depressing indie) and Royksopp's new album.

Watching:

I recently saw Tank Girl, it was awesome, I recommend it.

Theatre:
I saw Monash Uni Shakespeare Society's 'A Midsummer Nights Dream' last night, it was entertaining and very funny along with some weird awkward moments. Music was interesting, but the comedy was very good.

Also my friend Pen Bartlau has co written and directed a play called 'The Keeper' which is on a La Mama for a while, check it out, it's great, I really enjoyed it, the music was great and it was so beautiful and simple yet meaningful without being wanky, yay for non-wanky theatre.

Me:

This is my first week out of hospital of where I was for a month, I've put on 8 kilos which disgusts me and makes me not a happy chappy, but other than that I'm ok, I have sweet as meds that are good and a clean room with a new bookshelf and little desk, I'm going back to uni on Monday which is already scaring me a little bit, oh well, we'll just have to wait and see.
Mood wise I'm up and down but not to extremes which is better than before so I'm okay with that.

I may post later, because this is new and exciting and I have nothing planned for today other than drinking 10 glasses of water.


L.