number seven.

OK, time for an update.

I am currently spending my time rehearsing with the Graduate ensemble for a production of Lysistrata, it is nice being around people who are genuinely wanting to study acting, so rehearsals are awesome and focused, although rehearsing 3 to 4 days a week is eating away at my holidays and sometimes the honours crew get wanky and narky, particularly the Melbourne uni students who are in it.

I'm also attending two lots of outpatient programs which is also going well, I'm going to Cognitive behaviour Therapy: Social Anxiety on Wednesday nights, and also a support group and another anxiety program on Friday day, it's nice to be around people dealing with what you're dealing with, especially because I spend most of my time hiding any symptoms or really anything to do with anxiety and depression and bi-polar stuff. So YEH. Fun times there.

On the weekend I also learned how to breath fire, there are photos on my facebook and I breathed two metres of fire which was better than our teacher could so yeh, there are possibilities for career opportunities here, if anyone wants a fire breather let me know. It was an amazing experience.

Other than this my weeks been rather shit, I missed a nights worth of medication which has played havoc on my whole system leaving me dizzy and light headed for a day, it hasn't been fun. I haven't been in a very good head space this week and I'm not sure what's brought this on, hopefully next week will be better.

Things I have watched:

Milk, one of the most amazing movies, I highly recommend this as both a good movie and a good look at the difficulties faced by homosexuals through the 50's 60's and 70's. It was truly a beautiful and sad movie.

I also saw In Bruges which was fabulous, book ended really well and had beautiful dark humour, I really enjoyed it.

I also re-watched A mighty Wind and also Best in Show which was great, they never get boring, the comedy is fantastic and the writers are amazing at character work, watching them again made me realize how amazing both the script and the actors character were.

Things I have listened to:

I got some great new music off Nick, this included The Flaming Lips, a band from Oklahoma which I love, The Middle East, a band from Townsville that I saw in concert at the Northcote social club and they were phenomenal live, their recordings arent as amazing but the beautiful harmonies and instumentation is always awesome. Blonde Redhead and Devotcka are also amazing bands. Still need to listen to a lot more music though.

So, coming up I've got more rehearsals, more therapy, seeing a couple of friends, and hopefully cheering up a little bit, I cant wait to go back to uni, I'm doing subjects that I'm really looking forward to and hopefully will lead somewhere.

Peace out,

L.

number six.

I have a boyfriend, his name is Nick, and he is lovely.
He also has THE MOST amazing music collection, 150 gigs of music...awesome.

So I have a couple of new band interests, they are:

The Middle East, a Queensland band I believe, they are quite unknown and I'm seeing them play this Sunday, they are super chilled and awesome.

Deerhoof, an older band, kind of rocky but with a whimsical female vocalist, equals a good mix. I like them.

The Besnard Lakes, nice falsetto boys singing melodic songs with nice instrumentation including violins and brass.

Electrelane, a bit more techno influences, a late nineties super cool all girl band, they are just super cool, kind of chilled.

The Knife, Sweden duo known for their song 'Heartbeats', good electronic band, sweet vocals and harmonies.

I'm also getting into some sixties rock which is pretty sweet, The Kinks and The Easybeats, yeh.

Ummm I have my directors assessment tomorrow, me and a friend directed a scene from Summer of the Aliens by Louis Nowra, it's gone really well I think, it's been weird, I dont know what to say exactly other than Socialist Alternatives are the worst to do anything with if it isn't related directly to Socialist Alternative stuff.

My week has filled up really quickly with directing stuff, group therapy stuff and a couple of parties and gigs which is exciting and also daunting. I'm also not getting a break as I go straight into rehearsals for Lysistrata which I'm doing with the Honours program at uni, I chose to do it so it's my own fault, but it also means I get to finish a subject four weeks into semester. It'll be interesting coz most honours shows suck so I'm intrigued as to what the process is going to be like, we have heaps of rehearsals and were told we'd only have two a week (lie).

I start CBT Social Anxiety tomorrow night, I dont know if I really qualify for the group as I CAN handle some social situations, its just crowds and stuff that I can't do. Nick made an interesting observation that my social anxiety issues are all linked to the visual, so I dont like people looking at me intimately and I struggle being around heaps of people because I think they're all judging me (on the visual), I know this is irrational but thats what Generalized Anxiety Disorder is.

I've grown so much since spending a month in hospital and I feel much more mature and able to handle things. It feels good.

Thats all for now, post soon.

L.

number five.

It's Saturday, I've had breakfast and now I'm listening to music, I'm calm, I can breathe, and that is a good feeling.
This weekend will be good if I can keep going with an assignment and all the rest.

Theatre:

Innocence: VCA production, about caravaggio's life, it was amazing, the set was amazing, the lighting was amazing, the actors were amazing. Great show. Well done fleur and wollan.

Reading:

"On the road" update: Disgustingly misogynistic, I find myself cringing all the time, but it comes with the style of writing, other than the disgusting sexism it's great.

Listening:

Kings of collision
Edith Piaf

Things I've done:

finished an assignment
started an assignment
handed in my main assignment for performance writing
got a two week extension main assignment for directing
kissed a boy
listened to the likes of bon iver, beirut, doves, devendra banhart, jose gonzales and edith piaf.
Watched television
kissed a boy again
bought an amazing pair of shoes
slept
made bircher muesli
made anzac biscuits
saw blood wedding again
started dating a boy
stayed up until 3am just talking to friends
slept in til lunch time


It's been a good week, this weekend will be great. :-)


L.